


Bisexual Disasters

by ElliePollie



Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fluff, Gen, Mall Trip, platonic bisexual disasters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23392084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElliePollie/pseuds/ElliePollie
Summary: Bisexual disasters, Mike and Emily have fun on their regular mall trip together, gossiping, shopping and getting up to some crazy antics!
Relationships: Emily Davis & Mike Munroe
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	Bisexual Disasters

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from Quentin on the Until Dawn discord: nobody wants to replace person a for going shopping with person b because they always come back exhausted and complaining about the trip. What they don't know is it's a cover and they both go out and have way too much fun and don’t want to share it with anyone else. Platonic bisexual disasters Mike and Emily. 
> 
> This was seriously so much fun to write. When they're just platonic friends Mike and Emily have such good banter. Thank you so much for the prompt! 
> 
> If anyone else wants to give me a prompt feel free to drop one in my Tumblr asks (@elliepollie)!

“Hey man, what’s up?” Matt nods as Mike comes through the door. 

“Not much, I’m good,” Mike grins. 

Matt turns to him frowning, “good? After a shopping trip with Em? Come on man? You’re always complaining about them.” 

“Oh… uh… yeah… well… I’m just… uh… happy it’s over… duh!” 

**Eight Hours Earlier**

The doorbell rang at 10 am on the dot. Mike burst out of his room throwing on a jacket and hopping around trying to put his socks on. 

“You seen my wallet anywhere?” Mike scoured the kitchen, continuing to hop. 

“No, sorry man,” Matt shrugged from where he was lounging on the couch watching a game. 

“Ah-hah! Found it!” 

The doorbell went off again accompanied by a loud impatient knocking. 

“That Emily?”

“Uhuh, impatient as always,” Mike shoved his wallet in his pocket and grabbed his keys from another counter. 

“Man, why do you even go shopping with her?” 

Mike runs across the room to the door, shrugging at Matt and shoving his shoes on. 

“Michael Munroe, you better not have slept in!” They heard Emily yell from the other side of the door. Mike mimed shooting himself as he opened the door revealing Emily standing on the other side, hands on her hips, frown on her face. 

“See you later,” Mike called. 

“See ya,” Matt waved as the door closed. 

“You know, you don’t have to be rude,” she frowned, “you could tone down the complaining just a little bit.” 

“And you could tone down the impatient bitch a little bit but we both know that’s not going to happen,” Mike grinned. 

“You’re such an ass,” Emily rolled her eyes smirking, “come on, mall time,” she grabbed Mike’s wrist pulling him down the corridor. 

***

“Okay, first things first, coffee,” Emily announced as they walked into the mall, marching directly toward the best coffee shop. 

“Agreed.” 

They made their way across the mall which was just starting to get busy, the Saturday late morning rush coming into swing. Emily and Mike navigated through the crowd easily, by now they knew all the best short cuts and exactly where everything was, they had, after all, been doing this for a while. 

They found the little coffee shop that sat in a corner of the mall, slightly secluded, and a good deal quieter than the department stores and chain coffee shops. It was one of their favourite spots. It helped that it also served the best single-origin medium roast around. A little on the pricy side but that didn’t bother Mike too much and it certainly didn’t bother Emily. 

They qued up, the barista smiled at them and reeled off their usual order to which they nodded and paid. Luckily their favourite seating was free, otherwise, Emily would have spent a significant amount of time glaring at whoever had stolen it until they felt uncomfortable and left. 

They sat down with their coffees and a sigh of relief, it had been a long week and they were both glad that they got to spend this time together. 

“So,” Emily looked up at Mike from her coffee cup. 

“So?” Mike raised his eyebrows, smirking slightly. 

“How’s stuff with you know who?” 

Mike groaned, rolling his head back against the top of the booth, “can’t we talk about this later, I need to loosen up first before talking about him.” 

“Fine,” Emily shrugged, “but you are going to tell me _everything_ before the end of today.” 

“Uh-huh, okay,” Mike nodded, looking around, trying to find another topic of conversation, “anything you need to get today?” 

Emily frowned, “Mike since when have we ever actually done any shopping on these shopping trips? Honestly, love rots the brain.” 

Mike spluttered, almost spitting his coffee out of his mouth, “I-I’m not in love.” 

“Sure, sure, you keep telling yourself that,” Emily took another sip of her coffee. 

“I’m not,” Mike sulked. 

“Okay.” 

“I hate you.” 

“Honestly, heard that so many times it’s lost its bite.” 

Mike grumbled wordlessly, hiding behind his cup. 

“I know what will cheer you up.” 

Mike looked up at her, “what?” 

“Finish up your coffee and you’ll find out.” 

***

“Why are we leaving the mall? We only just got here!” 

“We’re not going far, just, Jesus, will you just trust me for once!” Emily huffed as Mike tried to go back into the mall. 

“Not as far as I could throw you,” Mike shook his head. 

“You’re an ass Munroe,” Emily rolled her eyes. 

Mike grinned, “and proud.” 

“Just, come on, will you,” she grabbed him and yanked him across the road to the other side. She pulled him a bit further up the sidewalk and then pushed him through a gate. 

“Are you trying to suggest that fresh air is going to solve all of my problems?” Mike surveyed the park that Emily had dragged him into. 

“No, I’m saying-” 

“OH MY GOD, DOGGO!” Mike cried out. 

“Precisely,” Emily rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, shaking her head as Mike practically bounded toward the cocker spaniel that was wagging its tail madly and pulling its poor unsuspecting owner toward Mike. 

Emily settled herself down on a bench and took her phone out. Occasionally she glanced up to see Mike petting or running around with another dog, and when she thought no one was looking she even let a faint smile cross her face. 

Mike sat down on the bench next to Emily slightly breathless, “are you not even going to say hello to a single dog?” 

“I’m more of a cat gal,” Emily grimaced. 

“And you’ll turn into an old cat lady if you don’t tell you know who how you feel soon,” Mike teased. 

Emily turned to smack him but he was already chasing after another dog. She sighed and rolled her eyes, “that boy does love his bitches,” she muttered to herself. 

***

As soon as they were back in the mall Emily dragged Mike into the nearest designer store to do some browsing. She liked to check whether they had anything new in so that she was always up to date on the latest fashion. Admittedly, this was the least enjoyable part of the day for Mike but there was still plenty of opportunities to push her buttons so it wasn’t that bad. 

“How about this?” 

“Ew!” 

“Or this?” 

“Totally passe,” Emily rolled her eyes. 

“Oh, I know!” 

“Michael do you have to touch every single piece of clothing with your grubby little man hands?” 

“You’re the one who said we never actually do any shopping, from where I’m standing right now this looks like shopping.” 

“This is browsing, there’s a difference idiot.” 

“Ah, but browsing very easily turns to buying and what is buying, if not shopping.” 

“Fine, there’s something I want to test in the make-up department and then we can do what _you_ want to do,” Emily huffs. 

“Oh! Can I do your make-up?” 

“Certainly not, you’d make me look like a clown.” 

“Who says you don’t already look like one.” 

Emily whirled around, but Mike was already skipping in the direction of the make-up store and flashing her a satisfied smirk, “you better run Munroe because I am going to kill you!” 

***

Emily bent down in front of a shelf, full to the brim of expensive lipsticks and glosses, her eyes scouring for something. She shook her head and moved along. Mike was close behind her, but not paying attention, instead, checking out, in turn, the asses of a curvy blonde woman and a dark-haired young man. 

“Why don’t you bring me here more often? They’ve got some fine specimens in this department.”

“Gross,” Emily muttered, shaking her head, “ah-hah.” 

“Found what you’re looking for?” 

“Yes, now… which colour?” Emily frowned, “give me your hand,” Mike was back to checking out the dark-haired guy. Emily sighed and grabbed Mike’s arm. Before he could protest, she took out a tester and swiped a swatch of colour on his hand. 

“What the hell!” Mike snatched his hand away and began trying to rub off the lipstick. 

“No, don’t rub it off, I want to see what it looks like on!” 

“Aren’t you supposed to test it against your own skin tone?” Mike frowned. 

“Uh-huh,” Emily nodded holding out her hand for his arm. Mike raised his eyebrows, questioningly. Emily sighed and muttered, “it’s not for me.” 

“Am I to assume that this is for a lovely lady who’s skin tone is closer to my own?” 

Emily glared at him, “just give me your hand jerk.” 

“Well, if it’s in the name of love, I suppose I can spare this hand,” Mike handed it over to Emily. 

She took his hand and swiped several swatched of colour across it. Then cocked her head and frowned at it for a while, “thoughts?” She asked Mike, as she worried her bottom lip in between her teeth. 

Mike was taken aback for a second, having been asked for his opinion, on lipstick, by Emily Davies, that was not something that he ever thought would happen. He quickly recovered and looked down at his hand, “am I right in assuming I know which lovely lady this is meant for?” 

Emily grunted in response. 

“What was that?” Mike smirked. 

“Yes,” Emily grunted again. 

“In that case,” he looked closer at his hand, squinting, “Em, these are pretty much all the same colour.”

“They are not! Honestly, Michael, this one has more blush tones, this one more choral and-”

“Okay, okay, I get it! What about that one?” 

“Maybe, I’m just worried she already has a lot of similar shades to this.” 

“You could go with something more red, you know, to show you’ve got romance in mind. Roses are red, violets are blue, I picked this lipstick, just for you. I’ll give you that free of charge.” 

“Alright Romeo, save it for your one true love,” Emily rolled her eyes and turned back to the display, “how about cherry bomb?” Emily picked up a stick. 

“Nah, you have to go for one of the sexy named ones, come on Em you should know better than that,” Mike sighed. 

Emily grumbled to herself and put the stick back, “berry bliss? Scarlett seduction? Flaming passion?” 

“Sheesh, these are so corny, whoever comes up with these names needs to be fired. I could do a better job than that.” 

“You’re meant to be helping,” Emily crossed her arms and frowned at him, “how is criticising the names helping?”

“Oh, wait, perfect, Lady Love,” Mike picked up a tester and swiped it on his hand for Emily to see. 

Emily tilted her head and considered, “that’s a pretty good colour actually.” 

“Thank you,” Mike bowed. 

“Shut up,” Emily growled, snatching a stick of Lady Love from the shelf and marching off toward the counter to buy it. Mike snickered and followed. 

***

“Thanks, Uncle Eddie!” Mike grinned as the large plate of pizza was placed in front of him and then a bowl of pasta was placed in front of Emily. Coming from a large Italian family had its benefits. 

“No problem Mikey, you kids have fun now,” Eddie ruffled Mike's hair and then headed back to the kitchen. 

Mike was already stuffing pizza in his mouth, “ugh, I’m starving,” he moaned through a mouthful of food. 

“Gross, Michael! Keep your mouth closed while you chew, you neanderthal!” Mike just stuck his tongue out at her, Emily made a face of disgust and pointedly turned her attention to her pasta. 

“Hey, look, it’s a calzone!” Mike grinned, folding a slice of pizza in half. 

“Hey look, it’s an idiot. Can I eat my pasta in peace?” 

Mike thought about it for a second and then shook his head, “no can do, I’m afraid.” 

“I thought not,” Emily sighed exasperatedly. 

***

“Going to be a basic cookie dough bitch as always?” Emily asked Mike as they queued up outside the little rolled ice cream stall in the middle of the mall. 

“It’s a classic,” Mike put his hands up in defence. 

“It’s overdone, it’s not chic, and it’s anything but adventurous.” 

“Fine, you know what, I’ll try something else. What are you getting?” 

“Raspberry with Ferrero Rocher and white chocolate drizzle,” Emily smirked. 

“Extravagant,” Mike nodded, “what if I get chocolate with sprinkles?” Emily gave him an unimpressed look, “you choose then, and you’re paying.” 

“Pistachio with honeycomb and salted caramel,” Emily decided. Mike pulled a face, Emily rolled her eyes, “learn how to have a bit of class Michael.” 

“Afternoon,” the tall, handsome server grinned at the two of them. 

“Hi Tyler,” Mike switched on his charming smile. 

“Will it be the usual?” 

“No, no, I’m being adventurous, pis… what was it you said?” 

Emily smirked and brushed her hair over her shoulder, “one raspberry with Ferrero Rocher and white chocolate drizzle and one pistachio with honeycomb and salted caramel.” 

“Ah, a lady of such tastes, a woman after my own heart,” Tyler nodded in an almost bow, “coming right up.”

Emily smirked at Mike who glared at her for making him look stupid, “how’s the day been Tyler?” Mike leaned against the counter. 

“Busy, good,” Tyler grinned, “especially with customers such as yourselves,” Tyler winked at them both. 

“Stop it,” Emily laughed, rolling her eyes. 

“Yeah, man, you’re making me blush,” Mike fanned himself with his hand. 

“Hey, I’m only being honest,” Tyler chuckled, shrugging. Mike and Emily both melted at the sound of his laugh. 

“Honesty is a great quality in a man,” Emily inspected her nails, secretly trying not to blush. 

“So is ice cream,” Mike grinned. 

“Ice cream isn’t a quality,” Emily scoffed, shaking her head at him. 

“Now, now, claws away, there’s enough for both of you,” Tyler motioned to the ice cream rolls that he was making. 

“So what’s your favourite combination of flavours?” Emily asked. 

“That is a great question,” Tyler smirked. 

“... You going to tell us the answer?” Mike asked. 

“That would be telling. You have to discover these things for yourself.” 

“This is what I was telling you, Michael, you have to be adventurous with your flavour choices,” Mike grumbled and crossed his arms. 

“Alright here you go guys,” Tyler held out the little cups of rolled ice cream. 

“Take them, Michael,” Emily elbowed Mike into action while she got her purse out. 

"Those suit your skin tone," Tyler chuckled, nodding to the lipstick swatches on Mike's hand. Mike took the cups and scowled at the swatches on his hand. 

"Here you go," Emily held out her card. 

Tyler smiled charmingly as he took the card that Emily handed over, “of course you get the friends and family discount.” 

“Thank you,” Emily took her card back once Tyler had charged her. 

“See you next week,” Tyler waved them off. 

“You think we’ll ever get his number?” Mike muttered to Emily, handing her rolled ice cream over as they walked away. 

“I think _I’ll_ get his number.”

“What about your lady love?” Mike gasped, leading the way over to their favourite seats by the indoor fountain. 

Emily shrugged, “isn’t a girl allowed to have a little fun? Besides, you’re trying to get his number too and you’re in love with-” 

“Hey! I thought we agreed to ban that word!” 

“Michael, what did I just say about honesty being a great quality?” 

“I’m not in love,” Mike huffed as he sat down. 

“Oh my god!”

“What?” 

“They think they’re so cool,” Emily gestured to a group of younger teens, “but those outfits are all so last season.” 

“Oh yeah,” Mike nodded mockingly, “that hat is hideous, I can’t even look, I’m going to need eye surgery after this.” 

Emilly rolled her eyes, “ugh, infant alert,” she deliberately turned away from the direction the child was coming from. 

“Oh come on Em, they’re cute, do you not want to just squidge their little chubby cheeks,” Mike descended into baby talk at the sight of the small girl with big beautiful curls framing her face. 

“Snap out of it,” Emily waved her hand in front of his face. 

“But…” Mike couldn’t form the words to explain his cuteness overload. 

“Oh! First date at three o’clock,” Emily whispered distracting him from the cute child. 

“What?” Mike whipped his head around, “nah, second date.” 

“Trust me, it’s first.” 

The couple they were staring at laughed awkwardly and then looked away from each other, “damn, you’re right.” 

“How long?” 

“Hmmm,” Mike cocked his head, “couple of months. Oh man, nope, he just checked out... wow, she has a great ass,” Mike's eyes followed the same woman as the boy on the dates eye's did. 

“If she spots him staring like that," Emily tried to hide the fact she was staring too, "and she will because he’s being so totally obvious, he is not getting a second date.” 

“He could do better,” Mike shrugged. 

“You mean _she_ could do better,” Emily argued. 

“Women can always do better if they switch teams.”

“Trust me, I know, I’m trying.” 

“How’s it going? I assume the fact that you’re buying lipstick for her is a good sign.” 

“I don’t know,” Emily glared into her cup, “I keep getting mixed signals.” 

“Details, please, I must have details in order to analyse.” 

Emily sighed, “she gets all flirty but then she starts talking about other people.” 

“Pft, she’s just trying to make you jealous, trust me, she’s into you.” 

“Why can’t people just be open about their feelings?” Emily grumbled. 

Mike raised his eyebrows, “ _you_ could be open about your feelings. I know many people have doubted that you have any, but I have seen the sweet, soft, loveable lady you are underneath all this,” he gestured to her. 

She glared at him, “I hate you,” she swiped a bit of his ice cream, “oh that’s good, I should get pistachio next time.” 

“Eh, I’d have been happier with cookie dough,” Mike shrugged. 

Emily shook her head and sighed, “no taste.” 

“Look, you just need to tell her.” 

Emily for once, stayed quiet, staring at her now empty cup. 

“Give that here,” Mike took her cup, got up and chucked the two empty cups in the bin, “I know what’s going to cheer you up,” he said, rolling one of his sleeves up. 

“What?” 

Mike plunged his hand into the fountain. 

“What are you doing! You’ll probably catch something from that water! Imagine all the gross children who have stuck their sticky little hands in there.” 

Mike pulled out a fist full of change from the water. 

“Mike you can’t take that,” Emily crossed her arms. 

“Oh come on, trust me, what we’re about to do with it means it will just go straight back to the mall.” 

“Fine,” Emily sighed and stood up to follow him, wherever he was taking them. 

***

“This is ridiculous Michael,” Emily looked down at him as he slotted the coins into the little car. 

“It will be fun, trust me, I trusted you earlier.” 

“Barely, I had to drag you to that park!” 

“Come on, get in, it’s ready to go.” 

“Ugh! I hate you so much,” Emily groaned, squashing herself into the child-sized car. 

Mike pushed the button and then hopped onto the back, balancing precariously as it began to move back and forth. 

“This is so stupid,” Emily glared back at him. 

“Aww come on, give me a smile,” Mike reached out and pulled her mouth into a smile shape. 

The rocking motion started to get faster and started to make Emily feel a little giddy, she started to feel a laugh bubble up inside her, she managed to keep it down but couldn’t help the corners of her mouth turning up slightly. 

“I saw that! See! You are- AH!” The car gave a particularly violent jerk and Mike went flying off it and rolled across the mall floor. Emily burst out laughing, wrapping her arms around her stomach and rocking back and forth with the motion of the little car. 

“Yeah, very funny,” Mike muttered, pulling himself up off the ground. 

Emily continued laughing so hard she couldn’t get words out, there were tears streaming down her cheeks. 

“I’m glad my pain is so amusing,” Mike crossed his arms as the car slowly began to come to a halt. 

“You were right, that was fun!” Emily snickered, still recovering as she climbed out of the car. 

“How about we spend the rest of this change at the arcade?” Mike suggested. Emily nodded, wiping her eyes, very glad that she was wearing waterproof mascara. 

***

“And that is how you do it,” Emily smirked, slotting the gun back in its space. 

“That was just luck.” 

“I beat you every time we come here. Let’s face it, I’d survive the zombie apocalypse, you wouldn’t.” 

“Oh, come on! Have you seen this face?” Mike pulled on his most charming smile, “this will get me through anything.” 

“Yes, perfect zombie bait.” Emily patted his cheek a bit harder than necessary. 

“I’m just saying, I think I’m a bit more charismatic than you are.” 

“Mike, I’m intelligent, I’m resourceful and I’m persuasive, and I’m going to survive the apocalypse a lot longer than you are.” 

“I’m all of those things too, plus oozing with charm.” 

“Okay then, win me a stuffed animal.” Emily pointed to the claw machine. 

“What does this have to do with anything?” 

“Win me a stuffed animal and I’ll say that you’d survive longer than I would.” 

“Fine,” Mike rolled up his sleeves and marched over, “you have a preference as to which one?” 

“Nope,” Emily shook her head casually walking over to stand beside him. 

After a few attempts and one quick trip back to the fountain for more change, Mike managed to grab a small black kitten toy, “there you go my lady,” Mike presented to Emily with a flourish. 

“And you proved my point,” Emily smirked, plucking it out of his hands. 

“Hey, no! That wasn’t the deal!” 

“I was just showing that I’m more, intelligent, resourceful and persuasive than you are.” 

“Okay fine,” Mike held his hands up in defeat, “but you have to give that to your lady friend along with the lipstick,” Mike offered Emily a handshake. 

Emily glared at him, “fine,” she muttered, shaking his hand. Mike grinned. 

***

“Oooooh, karaoke machine!” Mike bounded up to it, “I wonder whether we can test it out.” 

“No!” Emily groaned. 

“Oh my god! They have Britney!” Mike quickly entered the song number in, “come on Em,” he held out the second microphone “you can’t desert me on this one.” 

The song started, “seriously Michael?” 

“What? Womanizer is my personal anthem!

_Superstar  
_ _Where you from, how's it going?  
_ _I know you  
_ _Got a clue, what you doing?”_

Mike sang the words at Emily until she reluctantly joined in. By the time the song got to the chorus they had both gotten into it and were singing their hearts out. 

_“Womanizer, woman-womanizer  
_ _You're a womanizer  
_ _Oh, womanizer, oh  
_ _You're a womanizer, baby”_

They danced around each other, laughing and singing, Emily whipping her hair back and forth. Emily was impressed by how well Mike knew all the words as he went full ham while she kept having to check the lyrics. 

_“Womanizer, woman-womanizer  
_ _You're a womanizer  
_ _Oh, womanizer, oh  
_ _You're a womanizer, baby”_

They finished with a flourish. There were a couple of claps and whoops from around the shop. Emily laughed, embarrassed, while Mike took a bow. 

“Uh, that tired me out,” Emily yawned. 

“I have the perfect remedy,” Mike grinned. 

***

“Em, you’ve gotta try this, it’s softer than a mini marshmallow,” Mike sighed contentedly as he sunk into the mattress that he’d just leapt onto. 

Emily, having loosened up over the course of the day sat down on the mattress with only a small eye roll. 

“Ugh, I should get myself a new mattress soon, I’ve really worn out my current one if you know what I mean,” he smirked. 

“Yuck,” Emily pulled a face of disgust. 

“You’re just jealous.” 

“Nope, I feel sorry for your sexual partners.” 

“Hey, we have a fun time, little bit of give and take, no one ever gets left out.” 

“Double yuck, I did not need details.” 

Mike went quiet for a bit, “to be honest I haven’t been with anyone in a while.” 

“Yeah, me neither,” Emily sighed, lying down on the mattress too, “we’re both hung up on people we can’t have.” 

“Em, you know she would totally say yes if you just asked her. Hey, you know what? We should go get a little gift bag for that kitten and lipstick, make it into a little romantic gesture.” 

“You think that would work?” Emily frowned. 

“Totally, chicks love that kind of stuff!” 

“Okay.” 

“But first, I just want to enjoy lying on this beautiful, fluffy cloud for a bit.” 

“It is pretty soft.” 

“I told you!” 

***

“Excuse me, sir, madam,” they both slowly woke up to a nervous-looking store attendant standing over them, “these mattresses are… um… just for testing… not… uh… sleeping,” the store attendant smiled apologetically. 

“And how exactly are we supposed to ‘test’ them if not sleeping? What exactly is it we’re meant to test? I mean we could get down and dirty right here if you wanted. Is that what you mean by testing?” 

“Eww, Michael, as if!” 

“Not into public debauchery Em?” 

“I’m not into you,” Emily rolled her eyes. 

“That’s a lie,” Mike winked at the store attendant. 

“If you would like to do a more… uh… thorough testing we have a forty-eight hour testing period during which you can return the mattress at any time if it is not satisfactory.” 

“I think we’ll pass on that one,” Emily gracefully pulled herself up off the bed, “come on Michael, home time,” Mike groaned and rolled off the bed and into a standing position. 

“Wait,” Mike stopped Emily as they walked out of the store, checking his watch, “we still have time to get that gift bag!” 

“Ugh! I was hoping you’d forgotten about that,” Emily groaned. 

“Nope, not a chance. Love guru Munroe is on the job,” Mike marched toward the card store. 

***

**The Next Day**

Mike wakes up to a loud hammering on the door. He groans, pulls himself out of bed, throws some clothes on and leaves his room. Matt is already at the door, opening it. 

Emily bursts in, “MUNROE I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!” She charges at him. He tries to escape back into his room but she jumps on his back, “YOU WROTE THAT STUPID POEM ON THE RECEIPT AND PUT IT IN THE BAG AND SHE SAW IT!” She pulls at his hair. 

“Ow! Em! Ow! Calm down! Calm down!” 

“I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!” 

“What did she say?” 

Emily stops for a moment, “what do you mean?” 

“What did she say when she saw the poem?” 

“I-I don’t know…” 

“How do you not know?” 

“I left to murder you!” 

“Oh my god, Emily! What is wrong with you? You bisexual disaster!” 

“Takes one to know one,” Emily hisses. 

The doorbell rings, “I’m guessing that’ll be her,” Mike grins. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Mistakes are just opportunities in disguise (but you should probably still check the name at the top of your texts)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24613711) by [TheIcyQueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheIcyQueen/pseuds/TheIcyQueen)




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